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Support and Representation for LGBTQ+ Youth

• Zachery Williams • Season 3 • Episode 13

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What if embracing your true self could transform your life and the lives of countless others? Join us as we sit down with the extraordinary Sunshine Bella Goodman, a proud Black transgender woman and self-belief coach. Sunshine takes us through her incredible journey from her roots in Roanoke, Virginia, to her impactful activism in North Charleston, South Carolina. Learn about her mental health struggles and triumphs, as well as the peace she’s found along the way. Sunshine opens up about her diverse professional roles and how her book, "Three Seasons of Life: Discovery, Beliefs , and Faith," encapsulates the core themes that have shaped her life and work.

Representation matters. In this episode, we dive into the importance of support for trans and queer youth, challenging the misconceptions that often surround their identities. Personal stories of identifying as gay and pansexual highlight the rich diversity within the LGBTQ+ community and underscore the critical distinction between gender identity and sexuality. We also discuss the necessity of setting personal boundaries and the role of authenticity in shaping how we are perceived by others. Sunshine’s powerful insights offer a hopeful perspective for anyone grappling with societal expectations.

Authenticity, self-respect, and faith are at the heart of our conversation. Sunshine shares her personal experiences of navigating the social media landscape and the often uneducated opinions that dominate public discourse. We emphasize the importance of self-love and patience, urging listeners to trust in their higher power’s timing. Sunshine’s message is one of hope and divine assurance, encouraging us to stay strong, maintain our faith, and trust that our needs will be met in ways beyond our imagination. Tune in for an episode filled with wisdom, courage, and heartfelt reminders of the power of living authentically.

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Speaker 2:

Hey, you guys welcome to Just the Two of Us. It is your broadcast host, mr Zach, so I want you to relax, put your feet up, grab you a glass of wine and a snack, cause you are tuning into my broadcast. See you later.

Speaker 1:

Hey you guys. It is your boy, mr Zachary, on his one to two and you are listening to just the two of us broadcast. I hope y'all are doing fine today, because you know your boy is always doing fine. Today I am sitting here with the baddest of baddest, the best of the best. She is everything you want in a human being. She is gorgeous, she. No words can touch her. I have mrs mrs sunshine goodman here. How you doing today?

Speaker 3:

I'm amazing. I'm amazing listen. After that introduction I had to look back like okay me, not little me, oh my gosh, like thank you so much. Thank you like I'm very humble. Some people introduce me. I'm always like, yes, but I, yeah, thank you.

Speaker 1:

Only I can do me yes so I like to ask my guests certain questions, like the first question how is your mental health.

Speaker 3:

wow, you know I have been going through a lot, but in the midst of it all, I have that peace that surpasses understanding, that people talk about, that the bible talks about I really do. Um, it kind of scared me a little bit because I was like, wait, why am I not panicking? Why am I not spazzing out, you know? So that lets me know the growth. Growth is there. So, yeah, that's where I am, like I'm really good. It's a challenge every day still, but at the end of the day I can say that I have peace.

Speaker 1:

There we go and, like I said to everybody, mental health is very important. I just want to make sure that everybody feel comfortable who they are at any stage of their life. Right, because you never know who you're going to connect with while people are listening. So let's get into it. Like tell me who are you, where you come from, where you born, tell me how you grew up. Like, give us the full story on who you are.

Speaker 3:

The full story. Okay, first of all, I am Sunshine Bella Goodman. I am a proud Black transgender woman living in the beautiful city of North Charleston, south Carolina. For those of you who are listening, my pronouns are she, her, hers only. Okay. I grew up in a little small city called Roanoke, virginia. I moved here in 2025. After a little bit of college, decided it wasn't for me, I moved back to my hometown. I moved back to Goose Creek, south Carolina, where my family is from, and what let's see. Okay. So, oh my gosh, what else do you want to know? So I am a I am a self belief coach.

Speaker 3:

I am a transgender human rights activist. I am an author. A lot of people don't know that. I wrote a book before my transition. Um, I am a licensed master stylist. I am a prophetic woman. I am having to get the prophetic um, so you call it oracle, but I do, I'm gifted in that way. Um, I am a uh certified community health worker. So that means I am certified in the state of south carolina to um help individuals find the resources that they need, whether it be um health care, whether it be, like you know, food pantries or that type of thing. I also sit on the board of Transgender Awareness Alliance. We cover the whole state of South Carolina. I'm also on the advisory board of the Trans Love Fund, which is a fund which is a program of we Are Family, which is a LGBTQ youth organization here in charleston, and a host of other things.

Speaker 1:

But you know, one thing you said you wrote a book before you transition. I did like can you go into the book and where we can find it at like? Give us a little bit background on the book situation so the book was self-published.

Speaker 3:

It was published on Amazon. I actually took it down off of Amazon because it has my dead name on it and my dead name. When you hear someone who's trans or non-binary speak of their dead name, that refers to their name prior to their name being changed from transition. So those individuals who do not know me by that name, I would prefer that they don't know it. So I took the book down. My hope is to be able to republish it now under my name, you know, under myself. You know I have myself my authentic self now. But it was called Three Seasons of Life Discovery. Yes, three Seasons of Life Discovery, believe and Faith. It was not Discovery, believe in faith.

Speaker 1:

I like those three words. Can you describe those three words or those three phases? That would mean a lot to you as now.

Speaker 3:

Right. So these three seasons, you're going to always encounter them, no matter where you are in your life. Discovery we grew up discovering who we are. If you are a woman who's married, you're going to discover who you are. When I started my transition, I had to rediscover who I was. You have to believe in yourself, you have to believe that these things are possible and, of course, you know, for those spiritual people out there, you have to have faith. Faith is faith will get. What will get you through when you, when, when you kind of teeter on the believe if I, if I can believe this, the faith will really help pull you through. So, as you go out, go out your life, you're going to recycle these three, these three seasons, these three seasons.

Speaker 3:

When you started this podcast, you had to one, discover who you are as a host, definitely Okay. You had to discover who you are as a podcaster. You had to believe that you could be successful in this, okay. You had to believe, you know, because I'm pretty sure there were some hiccups. You had to believe, okay, hey, I still can do this. You had to believe that people want to hear what you have to say, okay. And then you have to have the faith, to believe that, even when things didn't go as planned, that it's all ordained. I don't believe in any coincidences. So that's you living out these three seasons of life. No matter who you are, you're going to encounter these three seasons.

Speaker 1:

Word and the people in the back will get it. And people understand, they get it, they get it. It is not for y'all, but okay, let's talk about. You know your journey of transitioning. So when did you notice or when did you feel like you was not you and you wanted to transition?

Speaker 3:

So I was on vacation in Miami, florida, and I had my first tarot reading. I know a lot of people feel they have their own opinion about tarot. However, I had my first tarot reading and the young lady and I say that was a person because they identify as they were trans, non-binary they pulled three cards for me and the first card she pulls, she says why do you allow people to refer to you as he, if you prefer she, and listen, gagged. I was gagged. I was like wow, wait, wow, wait, wait, hold up. And my aunt was there with me and she was sipping her drink like well, it's 60. I was like gosh like okay, you know.

Speaker 3:

so I was like I really had to, I really had to answer. I couldn't answer that question right then, I couldn't answer it right then, but I had to answer that question for myself. And the next morning I got up and I was in the mirror doing my makeup. And what a lot of people didn't know is that when I was in Charleston I would be in and out of hair and makeup.

Speaker 3:

So some days I would look more masculine and then some days I would be full. I guess they would say, you know, fully made up, but I would go in and out of it. But when I was on vacation it was hair makeup like I was fully dressed.

Speaker 3:

Like the full glam, yes, all the time, like living how I guess I really wanted to live. But I didn't give myself permission to do that and so, as I was doing it, I began to kind of cry and I was just like, well, why do I allow that? Like, this is who I am, this is who I really am. I have to now give myself permission to live in the fullness of who I am, period. You know, I didn't realize that. You know, we do a lot of things subconsciously. We don't realize that our subconscious really affects how we move throughout life.

Speaker 3:

So I had to do the work, like I had to really tap in and figure out well, why did I? Why did I do that? Because I mean, I would get really get frustrated when people would refer to me as she, but all the while still wearing hair, still wearing makeup, still doing wearing all the feminine things. But I was like, well, but I understand. I understood from my upbringing. I didn't grow up in a queer affirming house. I didn't grow up, like you know, I didn't grow up with parents who were like okay, be who you are as far as, like you know, a queer person. I had to come out twice in my life once as a gay male and once as a transgender woman.

Speaker 1:

So I can relate to you, because I was raised in a house where we speak about it but we just going to put it on the rug, we don't pay, we don't see you, no attention. Like, okay, you just do you, but you just can't do it in front of us. Okay, I'm sorry.

Speaker 1:

I like to shake things up. Yes, come on disruptor. Yes, I like to shake things up. Yes, come on disruptor. Yes, I like to disrupt family things. I like to break chains. I like to do all that so I can relate to that. So, on your journey, what were?

Speaker 3:

some of the uphill battles dealing with yourself and your family. So you know, my family was a lot, a lot supportive, a lot more supportive. I feel like this this time around with my transition because I'm older now, you know. I just I just celebrated my 38th birthday.

Speaker 1:

She's so dated. She look gorgeous on that damn day too, thank you.

Speaker 3:

Like I am, and I think they've come to the realization that I'm going to do what I want to do. I'm going to do what's best for me, and I know that a lot of people may think this is harsh, but I told my mother, I didn't tell my father, but I was. I had to lose my parents in order to be who I am. I was willing to do that because it was more important for me to live in the, in the, in the full, authentic. You know, the full trueness of who I am, the rest of my days, because that's what's, that's what's important to me is to live true to myself, you know. You know, when it came to my name, my name, you know some of my family, they had, they had an issue with my name. So my family called me bella because they said that, you know, sunshine is just too much, but sunshine is the name that I chose for myself. One of my sisters actually gave me bella. Um, so bella is my middle name, because I was just only going to be sunshine goodman. I wasn't going to have a middle name. That was just going to be Sunshine Goodman and that's it. But I was like, ok, I can take Bella, because Bella means beautiful. But you know the challenges within myself. You know, as a trans woman, as someone who decided to get on HRT, which is hormone replacement therapy, there was a lot of mental components that they don't prepare you for, they can't prepare you for because they don't know. It was a lot of that Dealing with the mood swings and dealing with the changes to your body, your skin, all of the things, full transparency.

Speaker 3:

For the first year of my transition, I did not have sex. I didn't Because I didn't want anybody to touch my body. I didn't want anybody to touch my body. I didn't want anyone to see me like I was going through these changes and I was like I need to feel, I need to feel comfortable with me again. Before I could even, you know, before I could even do that, like it wasn't.

Speaker 3:

I was like, yeah, I just yeah, I was like all right, right now I just I don't want to like, I don't want to, I don't want anyone dealing because right now I'm still trying to figure this out. You know my body is changing, I'm still getting used to it. So I was like I didn't want. Yeah. So yeah, it's just, you know, but it really I have no regrets. I have no regrets. You know a lot of the girls. They all the work done. I'll have all the surgery and come back. I've always been in the forefront, I've always been in the spotlight, so I didn't have the luxury of just disappearing. I literally had to transition in front of the community. So those who knew me before literally watched me become the woman that I am today. You know the good, the bad, the ugly, the, the. You know everything in between. Yes, they witnessed it all.

Speaker 1:

So I want to ask you, like what is the difference between back then during that time, and now? And definitely in the community you know, a lot of people, especially children, are transitioning, are being who they feel comfortable being children are transitioning or being who they feel comfortable being right like. What is the like?

Speaker 3:

the difference between back then and now, from your, from, from your opinion, um, there's a lot more language now. There's a lot more like. There's a lot more. There's a lot more language, and even even me I'm still learning. There's still some things I'm learning today but there's a lot more. There was a lot more language around how to identify, because if there was something that you felt like growing up, I didn't know what transgender was.

Speaker 3:

I saw things on TV. I saw, you know, you know what I saw, as men dressed as women on television, but I didn't realize they were transgender or they were non-binary. I knew I was drawn to. But now I, you know, I see the children. They have a lot, they have a lot of language. Now, you know, in spite of everything that our government is trying to do for, you know, towards trans kids or queer kids, there's a lot of support. I had the pleasure of hosting a workshop for trans and queer youth about, you know, enduring Pride Month, and a lot of them said, you know, all of my friends are queer, you know, and I was like, wow, growing up I wish I had that, I wish I had that kind of support, I wish I had that confidence to be who I was then. So now you know, even seeing like they have it on television, it's in movies now. So now they have something that they can readily identify with. You know, representation is important. So being able to see the one thriving, that looks like you, that identifies the way that you identify, helps them to understand. Also, you know a lot of people.

Speaker 3:

I wish people would stop feeling, thinking that children don't know who they are. I'm like, if you are a hetero person, if you are a hetero person, it's okay for people to accept that you like girls or you like boys, like okay, they know that they know that they like girls. They know they like boys, girls or you like boys. They know that. They know that they like girls. They know they like boys. But if you are a queer child, it's like they feel like something is wrong with our brain. We can't know that we like the same thing. It always blows my mind that people are like how did you know this? But they can't know that they're trans or they can't know that they're queer. They can't know that they're trans or they can't know that they're queer. They can't know that they're gay or they can't know that they're lesbian. Why is it so hard for you to believe that. It's not that it's not hard, it's just that you don't want to believe that.

Speaker 1:

And I think, just to add on top of that, I think a lot of people are not open-minded to learn it and I think a lot of people don't want to be educated Because for me, I let people be who they are individually right Now. Coming out of me, I identify as gay. I like dudes Well, if those who know me on my broadcast, so I have a thing for masculine woman. Okay, it's kind of a weird thing. It's just one of my things. No, Listen.

Speaker 3:

If that's who you are, that's who you are. I identify as pansexual. So pansexual is my attraction extends beyond just men. You know I'm attracted to, I'm physically attracted to women. I'm attracted to trans women. I'm attracted to trans men. I am attracted to sexuality. I lean more towards masculinity than femininity, but my attraction extends beyond that. Now, as far as like my sex, it's been mainly with cisgendered men, but my attraction expands beyond that because I can appreciate the beauty in all people. So, for you, I understand where you're coming from, where you said your attraction. Because another thing people confuse gender identity with sexuality. They are two completely different things.

Speaker 1:

I could be a transgender lesbian. They didn't hit you in the back. You need to repeat that again.

Speaker 3:

Gender, identity and sexuality are two completely different things Completely. But people want to lump them all. They want to lump them all together and you know, I believe that I'm going to blame it on social media. People are way too entitled to the lives of other people. People don't leave the boundaries, no, and social media? Social media kicked the door off for boundaries, like that's. One thing I help to teach people is how to set boundaries for themselves and how to be okay when people buck back against those boundaries because they don't. They can't understand why it is.

Speaker 1:

You were this way and now you're telling me no, because I'm standing up for myself, because I think, on top of that, I think people want to be in control of like your, of like your life and the way how you want them to want them to live in their eyes and they don't want you to change and they'll set that boundary, like hey.

Speaker 1:

I set these boundaries for a reason, so I can feel secure in myself, like hey, I feel interesting. But, like I was saying, like people don't understand boundaries, like people want to test that boundaries, test that line. And I want people to test that line with me, especially with me, because I bark back. I like to bark back, I'm like okay, test me if you want to. You see what's up, and for you just to just say that and the way how you carry yourself, it's phenomenal. Thank, you.

Speaker 1:

And I think there's not a lot of person like you, especially like you.

Speaker 3:

It's work. People always ask me I'm like y'all. It wasn't always like this. You know everything.

Speaker 3:

Every important thing in this life comes from a decision, and you have to decide what you want for yourself, what you want your life to look like, how you want to be perceived, how do you want people to introduce you? Because my thing is, how you live your life is going to determine how people introduce you. When I got on this podcast this is our first time speaking, but I didn't know how you was going to introduce yourself. However, by the way that I present myself and the way that I carry myself, I shouldn't expect anything less than what you gave me. I am very appreciative of it, because that lets me know I'm doing the right thing. I'm walking the straight line, or maybe the crooked line. Sometimes you need to walk the crooked line, okay, but walking the line. I'm walking the line that I'm supposed, supposed to. I'm carrying myself the way that I want to. I'm being perceived the way that I want to, because that's what feels good and true and authentic to me. So you know it took. I knew that, I knew coming into. Okay, these are things that I want. This is how I want to live my life.

Speaker 3:

You know, especially when you transition, or you transition from male to female, female to male, you get to determine what type of woman you want to be, what type of man you want to be, what type of man you want to be, even if you're not trans. You, in this world, get to determine what type of person you want to be, and whoever you decide to be is exactly what the world's going to give you. So if people don't respect you, it's because you don't respect yourself. In a lot of instances, if people do not respect you, it's because you do not respect yourself. Even before my transition, people would ask well, how are you treated? How do people treat you? And I said well, you know, I really don't have a lot of the issues that other folk have because of the way that I carry myself. I don't present myself as someone to be played with or to be taken lightly. So respect is not for me. Respect is not an option.

Speaker 1:

You won't give me respect regardless. And I think for me to take it even further. I think you allow people to disrespect you and I think for not saying anything about it Right. And it's like you letting people walk over you because, at the end of the day, nobody knows you besides you. Right, you can walk in a room with thousands of million people who don't know you, and the first time you open your mouth, they are going to listen, they are going to judge you. Yes, like I want people to able to.

Speaker 1:

Number one love yourself. Right, because nobody can love you. Love you but also have that confidence in yourself in a way, how you want to be treated, right. So my next question is for you why do you think it's so? I'll say this why do you think it's so hard to be feminine now in these days than being masculine? Because now I see on social media and I see it in person, that a lot of people have a problem with men being feminine and they're like you're supposed to be, this masculine, this big, strong guy. So why do you think that is like a trouble now these days?

Speaker 3:

You know, again, social media is exposing us to a lot, Okay and fast, and we are in an. I feel like we are in an era of bandwagon. We are in an era of follow the leader, what feels good, what's getting traction. So I'm going to do and I'm going to say whatever is going to get me the most responses, because that is what's going to set my endorphins off and that's what's going to make me feel good, because I want the reaction and I want the response that these other folk are getting, Instead of focusing on the things that you truly want, the things that you truly desire.

Speaker 3:

It's easy for me to tear this thing down, because if I tear this thing down, if I divert the attention from me, I don't have to deal with the shit that I really have going on. So I'm going to sit on social media and I'm going to tear someone else down, because if I'm so busy laughing at the next person or if I'm so busy tearing this person down, I can't focus on this. All the women are focused on the men. All the men want to be flamboyant. All the men want to be this. That's not true. That's what your, that's what your focus is. If you will focus on the men who, who desire you, instead of focusing on the men who are femme, who are not worried about you. Maybe you could get, maybe you could get the man that you want.

Speaker 3:

Your focus, your focus, is diverted from what it is that you want, Even with men the men on the social media. Well, they doing this and the men are doing this, and the men doing this. Sir, if you are attracted to women, why is your focus on this? All of these podcasters are so busy talking about the gay people, gay men and gay they doing this. The trans people and they doing this because that's what's getting attention. My thing is why don't y'all feel that heterosexual people are interesting enough to talk about?

Speaker 1:

you know. And just to add on top of that, because, oh my gosh, one thing I hate when a group of uneducated people talk about a subject that they don't have no information about. And then when you sit on a platform, what a lot of people are listening to you will take that and run with it instead of you educating yourself about it and be like, oh, let me get back with you on that. No, you play lies and people will go with it. Tell you, when people have platforms like you have to be mindful of what you said, and like you've got 10,000 million people Somebody going to take that shit and run with it.

Speaker 3:

You should be. I'll say this you should be mindful of it. You don't have to be. Be mindful of it. You don't have to be because listen, you don't have to because people do it again. People do what they want to do. They set these podcasts up and they're very they are very strategic in how they do it. They have these conversations. They don't. They don't invite someone who's queer, they don't invite someone who's trans to be a part of the conversation. Why? Because they want to put, they want to push their agenda. Okay, if you want to talk about agendas, they want to push their narratives because, again, it's all about the traction, it's all about what's going to get me the most likes. It's all about how viral can this podcast go so that I can get this money.

Speaker 3:

They don't want the outside opinion. I always tell people there's a lot of voluntary delusion in this country. People are choosing to be delusional because my thing is, there's plenty of information out there, there's plenty of educated individuals out there who are willing to come to the table and have a genuine conversation. But that's not what they want. Not all, but majority of them do not want that.

Speaker 3:

Because it's more funny, it's more catchy. It's more trendy to talk shit about LGBTQ people. It's more trendy to talk about more shit about, you know, queer people, but my thing is every dog has their day and people need to learn to realize that everyone is on the bandwagon of, you know, this trans hate, and it's queer hate right now, but just a few years ago it was Black Lives Matter and then after that it was the Asian hate. It's only a cycle. I said we really need to learn how to come together and really need to learn how to show love for one another, because the powers that be want us to be divided and want us to destroy one another, all because of our differences, when our differences really should be the thing that's bringing us together.

Speaker 1:

And I think on top of that, a lot of them are not ready to have the conversation, Like a lot of them are dealing with their own privacy, their own sexual, their own what they like. A lot of that They're't sexual. They don't what they like Loud ass. They not ready? Because, number one you point over here he living his best life or she living her best life, but what about you? You have first of all you DL, you messing with other DL men. That's doing the same things you are doing.

Speaker 3:

Okay, let me just throw this little piece in there. Let's not forget DL men that do the same things you are doing. Okay, let me just throw this little piece in there. Let's not forget DL women, cause I always say people don't. People always talk about DL men and I'm not giving them a pass, but they are DL women in this country too. Just to throw it and we can listen, I believe I'm an equal opportunity calling out, so we're going to throw it, we're going to throw it on the bus. Let's also understand there are DL women out there who feel like they can't live in their truth either, and who may be in a relationship with a man, but you low-key over here with this woman.

Speaker 1:

They are DL people in this world. Yes, and the fact that when a person who comes, who's a part of the community, comes around you, you give it like you shout and you're doing so much like and you got me chilling with you, like, why are you doing all that? It's something you need to tell me.

Speaker 3:

Right, just start.

Speaker 1:

It's something you need to tell us. Are we shaking things up Like what's up with you? Like why do you feel so offended if somebody being happy for who they are?

Speaker 3:

Because people feel that they cannot live in their truth. And I said, you know, with me I have dealt with DL men. I made the decision to stop dealing with DL men because one I feel like DL people are selfish, they envy the freedom that I have living every day as my true and authentic self, and they believe, and also they're not really, they're not willing to sacrifice their comfort Okay, they're not really sacrifice their comfort for their happiness. But my thing is if you are happy, you can create a whole new life. You can, you can really create a whole new life. But people they are, but people they would rather sit in some shit than to be happy. There are so many people in this world who are not happy because they're not ready to lose or they're not ready to sacrifice their blood, family or whatever. And again, I'm not saying they have to. I'm not saying they have to, but also understand that there is so much more to life than being a slave to the boundaries of other people, by the rules of other people.

Speaker 1:

And I think, on top of that, when you, especially with your family members yes, you have some family members, yes, you have some family members that's like I'm not with it, cut off, don't deal with you. Yeah, you got some. You got some people who's in gangs, don't fuck with this shit.

Speaker 1:

And it's just like mm like, but at the end of the day, you, you, you gotta be happy. Right, like, like, but at the end of the day, you, you, you gotta be happy. You're like, I'd rather for me, for me personally, I'd rather live my truth than be a miserable bitch that's dope.

Speaker 3:

Right, right, right, right. People say that. People say that gangs don't fuck with it. People say that you know it's a thing, but the reality is a lot of those people who are in gangs or who are in these toxic masculine groups are queer, are gay and, honestly, the most truest love that they've ever received has been from the same sex. Wow, you know. I had a conversation with someone about why is it that a lot of men go back to prison. And the truth is, and I believe, that a lot of men go back to prison because behind those bars they can truly be comfortable, they can truly be who they are, versus being on the street. They can't be on the street being out here, they can't truly be who they are versus being on the street. They can't be on the street being out here, they can't fully be who they are. But behind those bars, no one can see. Behind those bars, no one can see the life that they're living behind those bars.

Speaker 1:

Nope. And you are correct.

Speaker 3:

Let me go back to where I'm comfortable. It's hard for people to believe Some people really want to be incarcerated Not all of them, but I believe some people, really some people do, because that's where they can live their truth, that's where they can be or that's where they can have the little bit of happiness that they have.

Speaker 1:

People don't want to realize and, like I said, people not ready to have that conversation And't want to realize and, like I said, people not ready to have that conversation. And I want to be clear with my listeners. We are just being honest, we are being truthful and, like I said, those who get it get it and those who don't don't. My broadcast is here to be authentically yourself, speak your truth and speak your story Because, at the end of the day, a lot of people need to hear these conversations and I get all my listeners a lot like be who you are, don't be nobody else, because, at the end of the day, people are going to remember what you do in life, yes, and who you are.

Speaker 1:

So my next question is for you yes, how, how, how, how do you do it out here in this world? And? And what advice can you give a person like you who are listening and unsure what they want to do or who they want to be, are just trapped in a space that they just want to be free? What advice can you give those people?

Speaker 3:

So, as a spiritual person, I say God, okay, I believe and I trust God, and I believe that one you should consult, always. Consult him first. I would tell anybody that I consulted God before my transition. Whether they want to, whether they want to believe it or not, god created all of us, but I consulted him as far as my name, I consulted him with my transition and he affirmed it for me. It's not that I made it up. I know. I hear, I hear clearly from God.

Speaker 3:

So I would say one lean into who you are, but also whoever your higher power is, whoever you believe, consult them, ask for clarity on what it is that you should do, but also understand that we have this one life, just this one. Now we could go deeper and say you know, this could be a continuation from another life, this could be a reincarnation. All that's a whole, nother thing. But while you're in this life, no matter who you are, you deserve to be happy. You deserve it. You deserve to be happy. So my thing is whatever it takes for you to be happy, you should lean into that, like you should really lean and embrace that, because, trust me, these other people who are telling you what you should lean into that, like you should really lean and embrace that, because, trust me, these other people who are telling you what you should and should not do are doing what's best for them.

Speaker 3:

When I leave out of my house, I'm going to always do what's best for me. I'm going to wear what I want to wear, I'm going to look the way that I want to look, I'm going to speak the way that I want to speak and again, like I said earlier, respect is not an option for me. You have a choice whether or not. If you decide you don't want to respect me, then you will also decide that you do not want to be a part of my life, and I'm okay with that. I am okay with that. It took a while for me to get to this place, but I am okay with people. It took a while for me to get to this place, but I am okay with people removing themselves. I am okay with removing people from my life because I know that I deserve to be happy.

Speaker 3:

I don't know how many more days that God has for me to be on this earth, but I refuse to live them as a miserable woman. I refuse to live them as a miserable person or to live them under the thumb of what the next person thinks of me, when I know clear as day people, a lot of people are being fake, a lot of people are being phony and pretending that they have these things and they're pretending that they're living this life, when the reality is that you aren't, so I can't, I'm not going to, you know, measure my life based off of that, when I know otherwise, when I know different you said listen, listen half of what you see and none of what you hear oh, you be hitting it, you be hitting on the nail on top of it.

Speaker 1:

Like I said, those who get it get it and those who don't don't so what is next?

Speaker 3:

for you? Oh, what is next for you? Oh, what is next for me? Well, I just closed um, my salon, my most recent salon after nine years of being there, and I know, I know it's a shakeup. It's a shake, it is a shakeup.

Speaker 3:

But you know, I, god, has been calling me to one. Really lean into what he's called me to. He's called me to the people. I am grateful he's called me to speak, to be a prophetic voice, to be a voice for the voiceless, to be a leader amongst the world, not just for queer people, not just for trans people. He's called me to be a leader of people, and one you know, know, show them him and show them who he is. So my thing is now is to be a being a part of podcast is to speak. He wants me, he wants me to speak more, so you know, for more speaking engagements, to get on more podcasts, to get out there and to really show them that, no matter your difference, he has it for you. Okay, his promise is for you. I saw a post today. A girl said she said let's normalize comforting people without saying God, and I said absolutely not, absolutely not. Evil is running amok in this world.

Speaker 3:

Okay, Evil is having a party and they are snatching people up because people want things fast, people want it right now, they want everything microwaved. But my thing is, yes, it might take a little longer with God, but understand, god is the ultimate chef you got to. Let him cook, let him take time.

Speaker 3:

I want my stuff to last, I don't want nothing overnight, Because let me say something Anything that comes to you quick, fast, in a hurry and overnight is not going to last. These houses they build up within a matter of weeks Always have issues. I don't want nothing that's going to give me no issues in the long run, but I know that the things that he gave me it's going to be on solid ground. It's going to have a solid foundation.

Speaker 1:

But you know what? Let's take it a little bit further. Let's take it a little bit further.

Speaker 1:

God will give you something that you even ready for. You ask for God for this, and God said alright, you've been asking for it, I'm going to give you it. And the fact that, oh, thank you God, Thank you God. And everything goes south. God testing you like oh, you wasn't ready for that, See, patience is the key to everything. Tell you, the more you got patience, it's going to work out. It's going to work out. It gonna work out.

Speaker 3:

And that patience has to be tested. Listen, trust me. Okay, our timing is not just timing. God is not bound by the confines of a day, a week or a year. I remember a country God told me to believe beyond the boundaries of a year. People come into the year and they put so much stake in what can happen this year, but God said you don't run me, I run me. The thing that I, the thing that you're asking me for, might take a little bit more time than a year, because I understand that one. I need to build you up, I need to make you tougher so that you can withstand all the adversities that may come your way as a result of me giving you this new job, this new career, this new podcast, this new car.

Speaker 3:

I know that right now you may not be able to handle the adversity. It may not even be the vehicle, it may not even be the thing he's giving you. It's the things that come with it that you may not be ready for. So he's like okay, I need to make sure that you are solid, that you are firm enough, that you are strong enough to withstand people saying, well, who the hell she think she is or who he think he is, who is he to have a podcast? Why he got this or why she got that? God needs to make sure that you're not going to be out here tussling in the comments when everybody don't agree with you. Tussling girl, yes, I have to learn that as I go higher, I can't be going back and forth with everybody in the comments.

Speaker 1:

Hell. No, you can't.

Speaker 3:

That's low vibrational. That's taking me down. He wants me to be high. He wants me to vibrate high.

Speaker 1:

Girl, you be saying the truth.

Speaker 3:

I mean he's not going to give it, like you said. He's not going to give it to you, he's not going to release it to you until you're ready. I personally don't believe you can have blockages. You can have spiritual blockages, but I don't believe in blocking your blessings. I believe you can delay them, because everything God has for you is for you, it's for you, it is ordained for you. I believe you can hold them up. If he tells you something, if he tells you something, obedience is greater than sacrifice. Do what he tells you something. Obedience is greater than sacrifice. Do what he tells you to do so that he can release those blessings to you. But if you're not ready.

Speaker 1:

He ain't going to give it to you. Let that man cook. Let him cook. Let me sit back in my chair and I'm going to look in the kitchen and be like I'll wait until he calls my name.

Speaker 3:

Right.

Speaker 1:

I sit here. I got what he on the table for me. I'll prepare for me. I'll wait until he brings something from the kitchen. I'll be like, ah now it's time. Don't you get up and go to the kitchen while he's cooking and you think you want it in the microwave. You want it fast, go ahead, because he didn't cook it for you. You want to pop it in the microwave and be like, ah, I'll bring it back to the table. It ain't ready yet.

Speaker 3:

Okay, well, you can have that. You can have that. We see it every day People microwaving their blessings, people selling their souls for what they can have today. That's not how God works. He doesn't want it like that. Your soul is precious, and to jeopardize that for something right now, because you're not willing to wait, is so wild.

Speaker 1:

It blows my mind. That's all I'm saying. It blows my mind and, on that note, this is my last question for you. I like to ask all my guests who comes to my broadcast that's all of that you have done till today? Yes, and this is what's your final thing today. And leaving everything in print, any hand, anything that you touch. What do you want to be member of at the end of the day? Wow? What do you need here?

Speaker 3:

Um, first of all, that I'm not perfect. I want people to know that I didn't come on this podcast because I think that I'm a perfect person. I am not better than the next. I am chosen. But being chosen does not mean you're better than the next person. That just means God calls you to do a work. That's the first thing. Secondly, that I love people. I genuinely have a love and care for people and I want people to win in their way, not the way that I think they should win, but I want people to win in the way that best suits them. And that I was authentic. I was true. Know that I was an authentic person. I was true. I was always true to myself and always, you know, comfortable and confident in my love for people and my love for God damn that really got me.

Speaker 3:

I love that. You asked that because that's real, because I could click off this podcast and he'd be like okay, come on home. But Exactly so I'm going to say to you I love you. Because that, because it could be like I love you and I'm proud of you I heard, I heard just being transparent. I've only heard one of your episodes, but I loved it, it's okay. And listening to you, I was like and your age? I was like I am so proud because it takes a lot to do this and to be transparent and put yourself out there and you're not just national, but you are global. I am so your voice is heard around the world. So I am very proud that you are living as your authentic self and you're doing this and you're being consistent with it, like this is your third season, mhm.

Speaker 1:

Yes, to god be the glory listen, it has been like I said, everything is not giving you. It has been a tussle. It has not like having co-hosts not showing up and just being there and just time management and all the other stuff in between. But I am here now and I am enjoying every bit of it. But let me give you your flowers. Yeah, let me give you your flowers because I like to tell people, let me give you it. Now.

Speaker 1:

The work that you are doing now is going to be more. There's going to be a lot on your plate and you are going to be pulled on different directions that you are capable of handling. That you are capable of handling. You are. It's going to shift. It's going to shift and it's going to shift. It's going to shift and it's going to shift in a good way. It's going to shift and I want you to be prepared. As you're levering up, I'm telling you you're going to have some people who are going to be there for you and you're going to have some people who are be wish that they'd be in your shoes. You are going to level up that you never thought you were going to level up, to Keep doing what you are doing and do not.

Speaker 1:

Do not. Do not look back, do not look to the side. Look forward, because those are things that happen to you or whatever that's in the behind scene. Those are memories and preparing you for what you're going forward with and those side conversations that people are having to you, to other people. Don't listen. You keep moving forward and if this is the last conversation that I have with you, keep moving forward. And if this is the last conversation I have with you, keep moving forward. I just tell you keep moving forward and I'd like to thank you for taking your time out. You could have been anywhere in the world, but thank you for taking the time out and having the conversation with me. Anything else you want to say to my listeners?

Speaker 3:

First of all, you really got me.

Speaker 3:

Come on, prophet, you better prophesy, because baby yeah when I the time is not now it's coming, but when I finally took, when I really tell like um, all that I've I've been going through as of recent, it's really gonna blow people's mind and I really needed to hear that because it is. It has been tough, it really it really has been tough. And so to hear it, keep going. And I just spoke to a friend of mine recently. She called me at one o'clock in the morning and I said she called us. I noticed I know something that I literally haven't spoken to her in years and that's what she said to me. She said keep going. So I take that as a prophetic word to keep going. So I'm going to say to your listeners no matter what you're going through oh, this got me so full no matter what it looks like, do not give up.

Speaker 3:

I cannot think of the scripture right now and you may remember it, but it's do not be weary in well-doing. If you say not, god has it, I promise you he has it for you. You can call him God, you can call him source, you can call him the universe, but trust me, he has not forgotten you. He has not forgotten you.

Speaker 3:

No matter what it goes, I don't care if you're going through, if you need food, if you need your bills to be paid, he has it for you. Promise you, talk to him, give him your time, give him your time and I promise you he will be there for you. He is there right now, as we are listening, right now, as you are listening to this broadcast. He wants to hear from you, tell him what you need. Yes, he knows, but he wants you to tell him. He wants you to remind him of what it is that he said and what it is that you need and trust and believe. He will deliver it to you and it will be better than anything you could have ever imagined it to be.

Speaker 1:

That's it, and on that note, I'd like to thank you for listening to Just the Two of Us broadcast, and I hope you have a nice nice nice nice, nice and a lit day and a blessing on top of that. Like I said, you are listening to Just the Two of Us Podcast Deuces. Thank you,